are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I just want nice things and good sex
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I FOUND THE LEGS
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
