We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
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