I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
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