You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
