The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
