I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize