you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
