I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
