Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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