Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
