my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I lost the right to judge tonight
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
