and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
