I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Randomize