the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
