Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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