winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
