playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
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