It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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