yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
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