Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Randomize
