we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
cat food counts as protein by the way
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
