After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
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