It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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