I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
from now on my penis is your penis
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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