Sry I called you an 8
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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