so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
