she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
