Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
