Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
