I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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