i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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