i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Randomize
