just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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