My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
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