she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Randomize
