This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
