so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize