Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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