You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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