you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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