is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I have already put on my inside pants.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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