No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Randomize
