toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
