she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
