I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Randomize