So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
