When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
