My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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