Christians are straight up FREAKS
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
These tits shall not be calmed
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
