True but thats because hes a fetus.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize